


Fallin'

by DeviousBodminEngr



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-04
Updated: 2015-09-04
Packaged: 2018-04-19 00:12:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4725482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeviousBodminEngr/pseuds/DeviousBodminEngr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>i such at summaries...</p><p>Clara realizes her "boyfriend error" just right before The Doctor decides to leave...<br/>Rockstar AU, Professors AU, so many AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fallin'

**Author's Note:**

> One of my Favorite M. Hamlisch creations

"Um, Clara, we need to talk." Clara set down her highlighter and history book and turned to face Amy

"Ok, Amy, have we been having another spat with Rory?"Clara looked Amy over and noted she didn't look heart-broken or something but nervous. "No, no silly break ups, no fights for Amy. It's just that, well, The Doc told me something and um…" "You don't know if you should tell me?" Amy nodded vigorously. "Exactly." Clara rose, walked to Amy's bed and tried her hand at Amy's "Resolve Face." Amy burst out laughing. "S…sorry, but, you can do "Scary Threatening a Friend Face," but not my "Resolve Face."

"Amy, can you just tell me. Not good at the hole waiting and patience thing." Amy looked away from Clara and nervously wringed her fingers.

"Ok, um, before that whole, um, boyfriend error thing, The Doc told me that, um, he was going to, um, well…leave. And go back to Scotland." "Oh. That's it? He would have come back Amy. It's okay." Amy just stared at her. "No Clara. He told me he was going to leave permanently. You know, take all of his belongings and go back to stay in Scotland. And never come back." Amy watched as all the color drained from Clara's face. "No. No. You're lying. The Doc didn't say that. He's my Best-friend, he promised me he would never leave me." 

Amy grabbed Clara's arms and shook her. "Clara, he hasn't been your "best-friend" for almost a year now. He was lonely and hurt. Hurt by all the things you did or didn't do. You didn't tell him about Danny and the Initiative. You've ignored him ever since you've been with Danny, only going to him when there was something you and Danny couldn't handle. He's been there for you forever and you've treated him like he was nothing. What did you expect? That he would graciously lie down on the floor and say, 'Yes Clara, please walk all over me? Oh and, kick me while you're up there, too?' And also…" Amy trailed off as she finally looked at Clara again and noted that tears were silently streaming down her face.

"Clara , I'm sorry…I," Amy stopped once again as Clara jumped up and raced out of the room.

***

Clara walked for hours. It was late at night before she finally realized where she was. She looked up and saw that she was standing outside The Doctor's apartment. She looked up again and noticed that a light was on. She sat down in a chair out in the courtyard and thought about the last year. Okay, so Amy was right. She hadn't told The Doc about the Initiative and Dannt and all that. It just hadn't crossed her mind. True, she had always felt that she could share everything with him, but this just wasn't one of those things. 

Clara glanced up at the room again, and for some reason, felt anger build. How could he even think about leaving her? He promised. He promised he wouldn't leave. Deep down, Clara knew that the reason she was so angry was because she was in love with him, but she refused to acknowledge that part of her heart that was screaming for him. Angered and hurt, Clara stalked to The Doctor's apartment and banged on the door.

 

***

"Where in the bloody hell is she?" The Doctor said. Clara was supposed to come over after her classes and check in. The Doctor looked at his watch for what seemed to be the twentieth time in two minutes. It was one in the morning. The Doctor sat down at his desk with a book and pretended to read.

After ten minutes, disgusted with himself, he slammed the book shut. He stood and started pacing. He couldn't concentrate when he knew Clara was out there, fighting all alone. His lips curled into a sneer as he thought of Danny. Mr. Initiative-Solider-Boy. He sighed, ran his hands through his hair and sat on the couch. 

He had already coped with the face that Clara was never going to love him like he loved her. The first time he knew was during last Christmas... Or probably before that, when she walked in and, no the first time he knew was when she face him and asked him to get some coffee.No. Bloody hell, it was when he first saw her.. He had been enraptured. He was startled out of his thoughts when he heard a pounding on the door. In a second, he was at the door and wrenching it open. The relief at seeing Clara's beautiful face soon turned to fear when he saw her tear-streaked face and anger filled eyes.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Clara stormed into the apartment and turned to face him. He stood at the door, dumbfounded. "Pardon?" Clara narrowed her eyes and glared at him. "I ask you to be my Best-friend again and then I find out that you were going to leave?" The Doctor nodded slightly and shut the door with a silent snap. "Amy told you?" 

"No. I forced it out of her, so don't be angry with her. How could you do this to me? You promised me you wouldn't leave me. That's what you were going to tell me when you know you're the only constant in my life, my best friend!" She threw up her hands. "God, what is this? Can't anyone ever stay? I swear…" "I, I, I, me, me, me. Is that all you can ever think about Clara? You? That's a bit selfish now for a little girl like you! You're acting like YOURE MY WORLD!" Clara recoiled as if she had been slapped.

She looked at her Best friend, the only constant in her life,the man she loved. His eyes were filled with anger and hurt. "Doctor…I," "Yes Clara, you. You." That's all I ever bloody hear about anymore. You had a fight with Danny, you are having trouble with students, you, you, you. Why don't you try something new? Try thinking about other people for a little bit. Then you would see that Amy's is in a relationship that's confusing and new to her. River and John are growing closer every day. 

And me, if you thought about me, you'd see that I've been hurting. Ever since Danny, it's been almost unbearable to be around you. I've looked at you and have seen a new woman. A woman who, because of Mr. Wonderful, feels that she has to pretend that she's not as strong as she really is. Who's not as brave, and courageous and selfless. Everyday, I watch you go out and face the demons of life you've never heard of and social vampires that might get lucky and kill you. I watch you do this for people you don't know. You've changed Clara. You don't think you're a whole person with him beside you. And yes, I was going to leave. I couldn't bear watching the two of you together. And couldn't bear thinking that you didn't need me anymore. I'm your Bestfriend, like you said a constant in your life, I don't bloody care what other people think of me anymore! I don't bloody well care if they thought of me to be a perv, a lush, a hack, a bacalava!

I didn't want to be here anymore. I didn't want to need to be here anymore. I didn't want to need you anymore. And I didn't want to love you and want you with every waking moment of my life and know that you didn't love me and want me with every waking moment of yours." The Doctor stopped and looked at Clara. Tears were streaming down her face. She stood there, eyes red rimmed, tears making streaks down her cheeks and he had never seen her look more beautiful. He dammed himself for still wanting her. He turned his back on her. "Get out." 

Clara slowly walked up to him. Her body burned with the wanting of him. She touched a hand to his back. "Doctor?" He moved away from her touch and, gathering his courage, turned toward her. She rushed into his arms and closed her own tightly around his neck. He kept his hands at his sides, not wanting to touch her. For if he did, he would break. In breaking, he would beg. She tipped her face up and found his mouth with hers. She pressed her lips on his and waited for him to respond. 

When nothing happened, she stepped back. The Doctor's breathing was uneven as he looked at her. "Clara, I won't ask you again. Please. Get. Out." She pressed a hand to her mouth and raced out of his apartment, sobbing. When the door slammed, The Doctor jumped. He ran to the door and flung it open. "Clara! Clara!" He could see her running away from him, again. He slid to the floor and sobbed.

 

***

Clara walked into the Pub with Danny and the rest of the gang so they could hear The Doctor sing. It had been two weeks since their very emotional fight. She had only gone by to give him some reports he may need in his own class, and even then her reports had been brief and unemotional. The Doctor would always say the same thing. "Just put them by the table and I'll look at them after I grade my essays. You just go home and rest. You need your rest." Clara sighed and leaned on the table. She missed The Doctor. The man he had been before she had hurt him. The man she still loved. She sipped her cappuccino and waited for him to walk to the stool. 

 

The Doctor slid on the stool. He looked around, and not seeing Clara, he let the hurt overwhelm him and began to sing.

I'm afraid to fly

And I don't know why  
I'm jealous of the people who  
Are not afraid to die

It's just that I recall  
Back when I was small  
Someone promised that they'd catch me  
And then they let me fall

 

Clara listened and didn't even try to stop the tears that flowed freely down her cheeks. Danny looked over and sighed. He'd lost her, and he knew it. He got up and left.

 

Clara never noticed.

 

Amy, Rory, John and River all grinned at each other. They got up and walked to the door.

 

And now I'm fallin'  
Fallin' fast again  
Why do I always take a fall  
When I fall in love

You'd think by now I'd learn  
Play with fire you get burned  
But fire can be oh so warm  
And that's why I return

Turn and walk away  
That's what I should do  
My head says go and find the door  
My heart says I've found you

And now I'm fallin'  
Fallin' fast again  
Why do I always take a fall  
When I fall in love

 

The Doctor closed his eyes and let everything he had felt over the last two weeks flow through him.

Clara slid silently off her stool and walked up to the table right in front of him. She didn't even notice the others had left. She let his words flow through her. He was singing to her, for her, about her. She just knew it.

Help me I'm fallin'

Fallin' fast again  
Why do I always take a fall  
When I fall in love

(it always turns out the same  
When I fall)  
Lovin' someone, losin' myself  
Only got me to blame

Help me I'm fallin'  
Fallin'  
Catch me if you can  
Maybe this time I'll have it all  
Maybe I'll make it after all  
Maybe this time I won't fall  
When I fall in lov  
He finished the song and opened his eyes. She was sitting right in front of him. He jolted and set down his guitar. "Thank you," he said to the crowd. Clara got up and joined him as he walked out of the Pub. She stopped him when they stepped outside. "Doctor. I am so sorry. I never even thought. I know that what I've done has been hard on you. I miss you. I want you to be who you were. I realized something the other day. You were right. I'm not a whole person without him." The Doctor opened his mouth to say something, but Clara rushed on. "That "him" isn't Danny, Doctor. It's you. I never would have made it this far without you. You're on my mind every morning when I wake up, and every night before I go to bed. I need you to be with me. I need you to be beside me. I need you to make me whole. I need you. I want you. I love you." She took his face in her hands and looked deeply into his tear-filled eyes. "I love you. Please don't tell me that I've figured this all out to late." 

The Doctor couldn't do anything but stare. "Clara, you don't know how long I've waited to hear you say those words." Clara heard the "But" in his voice and went pale with hurt. She stepped back and wrapped her arms around herself. "But?" she asked in a trembling voice. The Doctor looked at her and shook his head. "Eudail,you've misunderstood. There is no 'but.' It's just you I want. You I need. You I love." 

Clara threw her arms around him and pressed her head into his neck. This time, The Doctor let his arms wind around her and hold her tightly. When she lifted her face again, he let himself be drawn into the kiss. He kissed her hungrily, craving her taste. Lips mated and tongues tangled as they lost themselves in their first real kiss. When they broke apart, they were both breathless. Clara nuzzled The Doctor's neck. "In bed. I want you in bed." The Doctor bit her neck and said roughly, "On the floor, on the couch, on a bloody table. I don't care where I have you, but I want you now. Right now." They broke apart and in unison ran to The Doctor's apartment. He unlocked the door, opened it, and pulled her passionately through with him. He slammed shut the door and bolted it. 

When he turned, Clara was on him, her legs around his waist, her lips and teeth and tongue attacking anywhere they could get. Mouths fused, The Doctor walked them on surprisingly even legs up the stairs and tipped them onto his bed. Because it was their first time together, he would do as she asked, and let them take each other in bed. The Doctor broke away and stared. "Beautiful Clara," he said huskily. She smiled at him through her tears and made quick work of the buttons on his black silk shirt. She pulled the tails from his trousers and pulled it over his body.

She let her eyes and hands roam over his muscular back and chest. She smiled as she ran her hands over his chest and tickled her hands with his hair. None of her other lovers had had chest hair. Understanding, The Doctor smiled and pulled her up to reach the zipper on the back of her dress. He lowered it quickly but efficiently, so not to tear the delicate material. He pulled the dress off and threw it to the ground where it joined his shirt. He stopped and stared again. She hadn't worn a bra and he now let his eyes feast on the sight of her almost naked body. 

He reached out and carefully ran his hands over her breasts. He let his thumbs rub over her nipples. She arched off the bed as sensations flooded through her. She pulled on his belt and soon on the button and zipper of his trousers. She pushed them and his boxers down his body and encircled his erection. The Doctor closed his eyes and let the moan break through his lips. He grabbed her hands and entwined their fingers. He let his lips replace his hands on her breasts and gently suckled on her nipple. Clara's head whipped back and forth as she let feelings go through her. Her hands flexed in his, screaming and needing to touch. The Doctor smiled and worked his way down her body.

Lips, tongue, and teeth slowly destroyed her. When he got to the tiny piece of red satin, he looked up at her. Her cheeks we flushed but her eyes were on him as he moved. With a small gasp, she felt and heard the small piece of material. She gasped again when she felt his breath down there. His tongue whipped out and circled around her clitoris without touching it.

"Doctor if you don't stop teasing me, I'm gonna get up, put my clothes back on and leave," Clara said roughly. Hearing the truth behind her words, The Doctor touched her with his tongue and then started sucking. At the same time, he entered two fingers into her and pumped them in and out of her. Clara felt the fever start to build. "Doc...Doctor? Oh. My. GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Clara spazmed as the orgasm ripped through her. Going mad, The Doctor dragged himself up her body and entered her in one smooth stroke. They both stopped moving and looked into each other's eyes. Then, it was all frantic. Clara lifted her hips in time with his thrusts and when the fever built again, they came together.

***

Later, when the sweat had dried, they held each other. "Why did this take so damn long?" Clara asked, running her hands over The Doctor's' back. He rubbed his hand over her cheek and smiled. "I don't know, luv. All I know is that I'm never giving you back." Clara laughed. "I hope not." She grew serious. "Doctor. You've made me whole again. I haven't felt whole since I walked into the school with Danny and I saw the look on your face. I knew that a part of me was missing, but I didn't know that it was you." She laid a hand on his heart and put his over hers. "I love you Doctor. You've completed the part that was missing: my heart. Thank you." The Doctor, overcome with emotions, pulled her to him and rested his forehead on hers. "Oh Clara, my beautiful Clara, I love you, now and always." 

Clara grinned through her tears and rolled until she was on top of him. "Prove it," she said. The Doctor grinned wickedly. "If you insist." As the fever built once again, they both felt whole, and would for the remainder of their lives.

 

***

Outside, Amy, Rory, River and John, With a look of exasperation, John and Amy slapped twenties into their respective partner's open palms. Rory and River looked at John and Amy and said simultaneously, "told ya."


End file.
